People get so stuck on keeping a relationship with a spouse or with relatives...even if they are abusive.Is there an easy answer to this problem?  Yes, and I'm going to give it to you plain and clear...  Get away from them!  Get clear the hell away and don't go back!  If you have to, pack your belongings into your car in the middle of the night and just drive and keep driving until you are safe!  If you're at a family gathering and one of them causes you grief, just leave!  Take a big old breath, get up off your chair and walk... no run right out of there.  This method has always worked for me!  Within minutes I was able to breathe and know within myself that I was strong and able to achieve peace by just leaving.  Even though I was by myself at least I now had serenity.

I'm Brett Rodgers, massage therapist.  If you like my articles please see my web site too!  I make the worlds best custom orthotics for the feet, cool and natural sitting cushions and awesome millet hull pillows!

Now say to yourself, "I forgive you for being a _________ because you grew up like that or because you we're like that in a previous life or whatever."(Basically you acknowledge that they are screw balls and that you accept that imperfection but vow to never be around that person or anybody like them ever again!)  Yea!  You realize that life is too short to hang out with those idiots and that you love yourself too much to put yourself through that agony again in the future.

People that are losers like to be around other losers!If you don't want to also be a loser then you will try to be around winners and seek to stay away from the relatives/spouses ect that are losers as well.  Let's take my dad and brother for instance.  If I say to myself, "Would I make an effort to have a relationship with this person if they were not related to me?" In this case the answer is no!  Therefore I have absolutely no reason to have any contact with these people ever again!  Yea!  Now I am free!  You too can be free!  Take it from me!  Just because someone has some of the same genes as you do, does not mean that you are forever required to talk to them, send Christmas presents to them or visit them.

Now think about all the people that have no relatives or spouses at all and are self made, perfectly happy folks.They don't need back up resources from relatives or spouses.  They are strong enough to stand all on their own.  In order for you to do the same you will have to be strong...on all levels...mental, physical, spiritual and emotional.  It is also very important to find good friends.  Almost everybody can find friends to lean on and to allow to lean on them when times are tough.

Some day you may be the only one in your family left alive anyway and you'll still have only yourself and God to be with.Clinch your fists and say, "I love me for who I am and God loves me too.  Anybody that does not like me can stick it where the sun does not shine...and yes, that includes spouses and relatives".