School teaches you to be subservient and compliant. When you're a kid it is the right way to act. You know nothing and need to assume the position of a student in order to learn. In business you've got to stand your ground against tough competitors. They want what you've got. It's life in the business jungle. Whenever you set your sites on big goals you will automatically stand out from the crowd and drawn attention to yourself. The biggest monsters on the playground might start to take you seriously and see you as a threat. Your presence causes tension in your competitors and in you.

There is a temptation to buckle under the tension to lower your goals or subordinate yourself to the higher power in your environment. Don't do it. If you do you will lower the tension, you will no longer be seen as a threat. Sure the tension will subside. But you will have paid a price for this peace. You will have diminished your social position in your group and lowered your self-image.

You need to learn how to stand up to strong people, and not let them intimidate you. Use your brain to get around strong people. Find a way to show them you respect their authority, while not showing any fear. Make a habit of standing up to the people that control something that is important to you. If you want respect you can't let anyone intimidate you into acting subservient around him or her. For example, your boss can tell you what to do because it’s his or her role to do so. But never let your boss use that position to bully you or treat you with disrespect.

When this occurs you must stand up for yourself even in the face of sanctions. In the long run your self-image as a powerful human being is more important that someone liking you because you subordinate yourself to them. They'll never respect you. Stand up to strong personalities and you'll earn their respect. If you want to play with the big boys, never let anyone boss you around.

-- Bill Zanker , President, The Learning Annex