It’s the cycle of abuse.  Abusers always have a history of childhood abuse.  They don’t mean to pass it on and they would do better if they knew how.  Whether you are the abuse victim or perpetrator, you must make a decision to stop the cycle of dysfunction now. Yes, the spider web of abuse is huge, but it can be healed.

Signs of Emotional Abuse:
• Unrelenting criticism
• Yelling
• Intimidation
• Sulking
• Manipulation
• Refusal to be pleased, no matter what you do or say
• Neglect
• Abandonment
• Denies you outside friends or hobbies
• Insists on going everywhere with you
• Negates your opinion
• Won’t support your success

It’s easy to see if you have been affected by emotional abuse, because the effect of abuse warps personalities.

Symptoms You Have Been Emotionally Abused:
• You are afraid to state your opinion for fear of retaliation.
• You’ve slowly stopped doing things you like.
• If you miss a phone call, text message or email, you hurry to respond, hoping to avoid a fight.
• You have been ignored or rejected as a “punishment” for your behavior.
• You agree to things just to avoid a fight.
• You report where you are, who you are with and what you are doing.
• You’ve never received an apology, even when you’ve been right.
• You take the blame & responsibility for other people’s unhappiness or problems.
• You suffer from low self esteem.
• Believe jealousy is proof of love.

Many people think emotional abuse only happens in love relationships, like boyfriend to girlfriend or husband to wife.  But domestic abuse is not the only hot bed of pain.  Emotional abuse can be seen in child abuse, elder abuse, between friends, family members, co-workers, neighbors and just about any combination of two or more people.

Solutions to Emotional Abuse:
• If you are involved in an emotionally abusive relationship of any kind, get out now.  And don’t go back until professional help is sought and completed by both of you.  Sharon is a woman whose health was severely compromised as a result of working in a department where her co-workers shunned her, made fun of her, lied about her and gossiped about her lack of success and brains.  Several times she did report abuse, but her immediate supervisor, as well as the human resources department, did nothing to help her.  No paycheck in the world is worth this kind of treatment.  Sharon was so beaten down from years of this abuse that she finally gave up and quit her job, before she ended up in the hospital.  So, get away from the abuse immediately.
• Stop the abuse by calling for help.  The National Domestic Abuse Hotline is open 24 hours a day.  1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

Let the cycle of abuse stop now and RUN for help.  Not another day of abuse needs to be a part of your life.