On the one hand this can make things easier, as often, the parent who is well will be able to help make the decisions and they will often want to either stay in the home or move, so it takes renting out of the equation.

Ideally you’ll need to discuss with both parents what they want to do, but it’s important not to rush into anything. Many people making decisions at times like this when stress levels are high, end up making the wrong decision and then incurring more cost later on as they ‘change their mind’.

As a result, it’s important to consider lots of questions and then decide on some options which, ideally, can be trialled.

For example, when you have two parents, one of whom is ill either temporarily or long term, it’s important to think through not only the next few months and the next year, but also what happens when only one parent is left. A hard thought I know, but it’s often what people don’t think through and the consequences of not working this out can incur further unnecessary costs later on.  I know this is hard to do, but some may be better off staying in their own home, others may be better off downsizing and some may be better off moving close to a family member.

Top 10 Things to Consider when one parent is poorly or needs care

1.    How ‘attached’ to the area are your parents? Are all their friends there? Do they have hobbies such as bowling/theatre nearby that they would miss if moved?

2. How adaptable is the home they are in? Does a downstairs bedroom/bathroom facility exist or can it be created?

3.    Is it possible or practical to have care at home in the short or long term? How much would this cost?

4.    Are there people nearby that can help in an emergency?

5.    If one of your parent’s is a carer of the other, how would you manage if they became ill?

6. If your parents do trade down , what equity would be left over after the sale to buy another home?

7.    Would an ordinary property be OK or would your parents benefit from retirement living in specially built properties or warden aided facilities? What would be the additional costs of this type of property?

8.    What facilities would the new property need to have? What is it likely to cost?

9.    If a parent needs regular hospital/residential care, what transport facilities would be required long term? A car may be fine now, but can your parents get their easily by public transport/taxi?

10.    How much can you as a family help with the care, what’s practical, what other help and support can you secure?

There are lots of organisations that can help you with these decisions, for example ‘Help the Aged’. Alternatively, your local social worker should be able to help and you should be allocated one during your loved ones stay in hospital or care. It’s important to liaise with social workers as they understand the rules and regulations of funding short and long term care, and what other financial or home support help you are entitled to.