Knowing your partner cheated on you is hard. But did you know your partner never had to consummate the physical relationship in order to call it an affair? Emotional infidelity is just as damaging, if not more so, than a physical affair could ever be.
Emotional infidelity means your partner has let someone else into their heart and mind. They have formed a strong bond with that person. They have shared their most intimate thoughts and secrets with their lover. They have told their lover things they have never told you.
Dealing with that fact is very hard. It’s much easier to forgive a physical affair, where little emotion was involved. It’s much harder to forgive an affair that crept into your partner’s heart.
Surviving emotional infidelity is going to require your partner’s help. There are certain things he or she will have to do in order to make you feel comfortable again.
First, they will have to cut off all contact with their lover. No email. No calls. Definitely no visits. No letters or text messages. No contact of ANY kind whatsoever. If your partner isn’t willing to give you this, then dealing with the infidelity will be impossible. You will have to kick them to the curb and move on with your life – without them in it.
Secondly, they will have to be accountable. You have to know where they are at all times, who they talk to, who they see, and what they do. The days of blind trust are over. They will have to make their lives an open book, or you will have to walk away.
Third – and most importantly – your partner will have to be willing to let you into their emotional space again. They will have to see you as the person they really want to be with, and build up that intimacy with YOU, not with their lover. The things they shared with someone else are now things they will share with you.
Getting to know each other again is a hard road, but it is worth it. If you are going to deal with the emotional infidelity, you have to get down and dirty with those messy emotions yourself.
It won’t be easy. You will have many doubts and concerns. You will feel a rainbow of emotion, and most of them will be negative at first. Your partner will go through the same thing, as they separate from their lover and come back to building a relationship with you.
You can survive emotional infidelity. There are many ways to become close to your partner again, and we can get you started with a few handy tricks.