I once asked a friend, who is 12 years my senior, about how he copes with his wife just going off the rails without any reason?
He was so casual with his response it actually worried me. He simply said "Just ignore her and carry on!"
I was pretty sure that wasn’t the right answer, but I don’t like to ask for advice, and then not take it. So, I tried ignoring my wife, only to receive more grief for not listening!
I asked another friend and he said "Peace is achieved if you let her think that she has won the battle, even if in actual fact you have won the war.
So I let her “win” only to be so frustrated that I quickly took up the fight again.
Sound familiar guys? Can we ever win?
Well, a third friend, who has been happily married for 10 years, gave me this bit of advice. He said, Jim, "Treat your wife like a queen and watch how she starts to treat you like a king!"
My initial reaction was “Wow.” Not because I was overwhelmed by the quality of the advice, but because I thought “You poor bugger! How in the world can you live like that?”
Well, let me tell you, there's nothing like eating your own words or, in my case, my own thoughts.
Over time, and a period did pass by, I took into account my friends advice. I started treating her like a queen, and the phrase “you get what you give” came to life. Presto, the wife is happy and I'm happy.
Certainly we’re both much happier than before, as we could never stop arguing long enough to even be civil, let alone kind.
I'm not sure if this advice will work for all, but remember, what goes around, comes around, so give it a try. She’ll be really surprised.