How to Build Trust in a Relationship With These 7 Tips

What does trust in a relationship mean to you? Perhaps it is something like this:

Firstly, Do you believe in your partner's ability? Can you or do you rely on them as a competent part of the relationship? Are you communicating trust to them? You are violating the relationship trust when you do not trust your partner or think them competent to do their part. The relationship will flounder in see of hard feelings and distrust if you do not think them competent.

Secondly, Are you predictable and reliable? Can your partner rely on you with predictable exactness? This does not mean you cannot and should not keep your relationship interesting. You should. But you need to be predictable. To be steady. To be constant. Reliability builds trust. Trust builds security.

Thirdly, Are you honest? Are your words conveying what you are feeling? If they are not they will know. The body does not lie. Your words may, you body does not. Are they the same? By that I mean are your words and body language the same when you express your words? When you tell them you are happy are you smiling or is there a frown on your lips, sarcasm and/or irritation in your voice? Be congruent and you will build trust.

Fourthly, Do you keep secrets? If you are, you are not only burning up your own energy trying to keep track of them, you are burning your relationship's trust also. You could be putting this energy to better use building your relationship. It is far better to come clean and ask for forgiveness, start clean again. The truth is, and you can take it to the bank, you will slip up. Then watch out.

Fifthly, Are you afraid of your partner? Do you tell them what you needs and likes are? Do you make them play mind reading games about what you think, feel and need? Don't do it. They like to be needed, just you do. A critical part of every relationship is sharing, giving and receiving. If you only give, when do they get to be blessed by giving back to you if you have no needs expressed? Confide in your partner what your needs are.

Sixthly, Are you growing? Are you doing things together? Every relationship has hills to climb ditches to dig out from. They require work and effort and planning. All of those emergencies and questions challenges are opportunities to grow and learn and bond.

Hold fast to those difficulties and be grateful for them and ask "What can I/we learn from this and how can it make me/us better because of it?" Difficulties strengthen yourself and your relationship just like an occasional wind sends a trees roots deeper into the ground.

Seventh, Do you know how to say no? Do you ever say no? Do you let your own needs go wanting by continually say yes to your partner? Do you go along to get along most/all the time? Do you know who you are any more? I have been there and done that. It is not purty.

I can tell you, your partner does not respect you for it and it does not build good will. There are no points earned by being a yes-man. Do not become a bodies subject or be subservient to your partner.

There is a difference being a servant or of service and being subservient. Build confidence and trust in your relationship by saying 'no' when you really do not want to do something.