Have you ever wanted or wished you could do something and then talked yourself out of it or got upset with yourself for going through that whole process? Sound familiar?  Well, it does to me.  As the saying goes, "been there, done that".    I believe that the choices we make in our life are governed by how much we believe in ourselves.

Parents come with a natural belief in the abilities of their children, usually beyond everything else.

When you love someone, you believe in their abilities and accomplishments.  But if you are that child and can't share the same beliefs your parents have, or you are someone who has conflicts,  you can change your perception of yourself.

I have found three steps that helped me to overcome some of the arguments that were going on in my "self".

1)  "Believe in yourself" is a statement you should not take lightly.  It's easy to say "I believe in myself", but when you analyze that belief does it say back to you:   I can do everything that I have a desire to do. >  My belief of me is so strong that I will find a way to do whatever it is I want to do.   Even when the "odds" are stacked against me, my need to find a way will take over. You can start your "self-belief" by finding out about your strengths and weaknesses.  Be pleased with yourself for your strengths, however large or small they are.  Do not be afraid to congratulate yourself for the small strengths, as you probably will be the only one to notice them.

Also understand we all have weaknesses and isolating them for examination and possible change will take some self-analysis. That should not be too hard to do because you would know where your weakness caused a bump in your path, and you, with self-analysis, should be the best one to make a change to smooth over the bump.

2)  "Believe in the power of your subconscious mind".  Have you ever heard the statement "once he gets his mind set on something, there is no changing it"?  Well that can be attributed to stubbornness, but it can also be a mindset.  If you choose to think positively all the time, things will start to change for you.  Constant positive thoughts can bring on a warm fuzzy feeling.

It's your choice to think positively, you will not hurt yourself or anyone else.  Only good results will come from positive thoughts. If you are a person who sees the worst in each situation, and you feel you need help with positive thinking, I have found that prayer helps me.  Others might find that aerobic activities help to get their mind on a new track.  You can also think about all the good things that have happened to you in your life and replay them in your mind, then you can feel the change come over you. Remember something like when you first learned to swim.  Wow! you thought you could conquer the world!  I remember that was a great feeling for me.

3)  "Use your subconscious thoughts in a positive way".  When you arise in the morning, say to your sub-conscious "I choose to be happy today", say it out loud and with emotion.  Again, it's your choice, and the more times you say it to yourself the happier you will be.

Something else you can say is "I am my own unique self - special, creative and wonderful", or "when I believe in myself, so do others".   Feed your sub-conscious positive thoughts every time you get a chance.  Just look around, you can see beauty everywhere.   Beauty is something you can be positive about.

Here is one of my favorite affirmations -  "every situation happens to me for a reason.  There are no failures, only lessons".  That is powerful, and it's constantly on my mind.

Ella Wheeler Wilcox understood the power of the subconscious mind and she wrote this:

"You never can tell what a thought will do in bringing you hate or love--
For thoughts are things, and their airy wings are swifter than carrier doves.
They follow the law of the universe--each thing creates its kind,
And they speed o'er the track to bring you back whatever went out from your mind."

Getting along with yourself is a most important challenge that face all who want to achieve more in their life. Therefore, by keeping your thoughts positive and filled with good feelings and emotions, the more you will be able to influence your subconscious mind.

Your reasons for inflicting this influence on your subconscious could be simple,  a desire or a goal that you want to attain, or a situation in your life you want to change or improve.  Whatever your reasons, you will find  that its to your own betterment to be able to control your subconscious in a positive way.