Relationship and understanding.

We meet many different people and sometimes, some of them may become our friends. Some of them are our business partners or just people we meet in the street everyday.

This article presents the role of understanding in relationship. To start with, we should define these two words: RELATIONSHIP and UNDERSTANDING

RELATIONSHIP

That is a state of being related to someone by kindred, affinity or other alliance.

UNDERSTANDING

To understand is to have something conceptualized to a given measure.

Those two words walk together. Relationship goes with understanding at least it should go with such quality. We conceptualize different levels of our relationship and depending on personal involvement we endeavor to understand more or less the other people.

The key point is to what extend we are able to pay attention to the needs and the words of the others as well ass to what degree we can cope with the others. Generally we expect to receive something if we give something. The same goes with discussion, feelings, gifts, attentions and other aspects of spiritual and material culture.

People pray to God not only to thank but also to get something in return. People talk to each other because of many trivial or less trivial matters, but always expecting to be listened to and considered.

When it comes to relationship between partners, relationship between a teacher and a student, a parent and a child,  the basic question is who shall be listened to, and the only answer is – both sides.

The art of listening and understanding what the others try to tell us is a basic key to efficient communication. How many times it happened that you talked to people about one thing and they understood the other or vice versa. Here, one could ask a question how to improve the quality of understating. There are ten points which I consider as crucial for understanding:

1. The will to listen what others want to tell us.


2. Being not prejudice.


3. Asking questions if something is not clear or more should be said.


4. Showing interest in the other person’s talk.


5. Confirm verbally or with gestures that we follow what is being presented to us


6. Never reveal negative emotions.


7. Never criticize but show other examples.


8. Never say “no” but express impossibility if needed.


9. Always be kind and patient.


10. Remember that we are all humans and share mostly the same DNA – be positive.

Bearing in mind those ten points will definitely improve our relationships from our and other people’s perspective.