Healthy Ways of Dealing with FrustrationWe have all experienced moments of frustration in modern life. Frustration is usually associated with not achieving what you want in a particular situation. Some level of frustration is expected in our lives, and can even be a useful sign to stop and see if we need to make some adjustments. However, if your frustration level is too intense or you are frustrated so often that it moves you into a place of frequent anger or explosive reaction, you may need to take a deeper look at the whole frustration process and what the implications are for your quality of life. Definitions of Frustration 1)Frustrationis a common emotional response to opposition. Related to anger and disappointment, it arises from the perceived resistance to the fulfillment of individual will. 2) a. the prevention or hindering of a potentially satisfying activity 3) b. the emotional reaction to such prevention that may involve aggression Examples of frustration in everyday life abound. When you are trying to achieve something at home or at work and you feel that you are being blocked from reaching your goal, the typical reaction is to get frustrated, perhaps irritable, depressed or even angry. In many situations, the feeling is fleeting and not much harm is done; however, under some circumstances, high levels of frustration can have potential lethal effects. Take the case of "road rage" for example: With more and more people in the world and in the workforce, roads are becoming increasingly crowded. Inside our metal boxes, we're not always as polite as we would be to one another face-to-face, and when we're all frustrated with traffic, sometimes people make mistakes or pull impolite driving maneuvers, which can lead to anger from other frustrated drivers. This often results in road rage, which can pose a significant threat to the health and safety for everyone on the road. Cause and Effect We get frustrated because the effort we put into a situation does not meet the outcome that occurs. Let's say you want to get your children ready for school by 8:00am and despite getting things organized the night before (their clothes, lunches, etc.), you and the children are not ready until 8:30am, resulting in a frustrating start to your day. If you find this kind of frustration continually creeping into your life, your are probably living with an excessive level of ongoing stress which can be quite damaging over time: Modern life is full of hassles, deadlines, frustrations, and demands. For many people, stress is so commonplace that it has become a way of life... Long-term exposure to stress can lead to serious health problems. Chronic stress disrupts nearly every system in your body. It can raise blood pressure, suppress the immune system, increase the risk of heart attack and stroke, contribute to infertility, and speed up the aging process. Long-term stress can even rewire the brain, leaving you more vulnerable to anxiety and depression. What Can You Do To Lower the Amount of Frustration and Associated Stress in Your Life? There are many ways to deal with frustration. Often if you can find a few strategies that work for you, you can use them to alleviate your frustration in the moment. A greatrelaxation techniquethat you can use anywhere is deep breathing. Take a long, deep slow breathe, letting it out just at slowly, focusing only on the process of breathing. Try doing this several times in succession, and you will likely find a momentary reduction in your frustration level. Charles Spielberg PhD and Jeff Deffenbacher PhD wrote an article for theAmerican Psychological Association, , titled: "Strategies for controlling your anger," suggesting that you slowly repeat a calming word or phase over and over until you feel a sense of calmness. They also suggest you do the word or phase repetition while breathing deeply.Another powerful technique is visualization.Try visualizing you are somewhere that reminds you of a calm time in your life such as being on a relaxing beach... involve all your senses, try to hear the waves, smell the water and feel the gentle breeze caressing your body. If you can, allow yourself tobreak away from the situation that is causing you to feel frustrated. This does not mean run away and forget what happened. The goal of this strategy is to break the repeated thought-patterns that fuel your frustration. By walking away and taking a few moments to do something else, or to just sit quietly and use somerelaxation techniques, you can refocus you thoughts and create a sense of calm. Once you've settled a bit, return to the situation and try to deal with it from a more tranquil place. When you've achieved a greater sense of calm, you can useproblem solvingtechniques to figure out how to resolve the obstacles that are preventing your desired outcome from being fulfilled. Laughter is the best medicine.If you can find something to laugh about your frustration will diminish. Try to think of a funny joke, if time permits watch a funny sitcom or a movie. Sometime life provides us with the best humour. A client of mine emailed me the following "Mississippi, my pet does not have that terrible disease, but they still don't know what's wrong. I replied" I am glad to hear Mississippi doesn't have that terrible disease…" My client wrote back, saying they had not laughed in days and my email made they laugh so hard that all the stress and frustration about their pet went away for the moment. The reason the client was laughing was that I was telling them at a session to count to 10 before they said anything and to use the word Mississippi in between to slow down their counting. So the "Mississippi" was what he was calling me, not the animal as I had interpreted it. There are times, when speaking to someone such as a minister or a therapist might be a better choice. When you feel that you arefrustrated most of the time about a variety of things in your life, or when your frustration frequently turns into anger, you may want to explore this with with a trained professional. When looking for the right person, decide what you think will work best for you. Do you think a minister or a traditional therapist feels comfortable? Have you considered other options such as Energy or Vibrational work. There are many different avenues that can help you. |