Order invitations only when you have confirmation from your wedding and reception sites. Note the time of the reception on the receptions cards in the event of an extended lag in time between the wedding and reception beyond the normal transit time needed between sites.

A broad range of prices is available among the different styles of invitations, but the price of comparable invitations varies little from store to store. Most stores require a 50% deposit when ordering, with the balance to be paid at delivery.

It is wise to order about 5 percent more invitations than needed to cover any mistakes or forgotten people.

How to Write Wedding Invitations

At the time you order the invitations, have the correct form for the names of the persons giving the wedding, the full names of the bride and groom, and the time, date, and location of the ceremony. Do you want a general idea ofhow to write wedding invitations? Look below.

If the wedding is given by your mother and father:

Mr. and Mrs. James T. Smith
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Mary Sue
to
Robert John Brown
(etc.)

If the wedding is given by you and the groom:

Mary Sue Smith
and Robert John Brown
request the honor of your presence
at their marriage
(etc.)

If the wedding is given by your mother, and your father is deceased,

Mrs. James T. Smith
requests the honor of your presence
at the marriage of her daughter
Mary Sue
(etc.)

If your mother has remarried, use her present husbands name:

Mr and Mrs. John C. Howard
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of her daughter
Mary Sue Smith
(etc.)

If the wedding is given by your mother, and your parents are divorced, use your mothers maiden name plus your fathers last name:

Mrs. Anne Miller Smith
requests the honor of your presence
at the marriage of her daughter
Mary Sue
(etc.)

If the wedding is given by your father, and either your parents are divorced or your mother is deceased:

Mr. James T. Smith
requests the honor of your presence
at the marriage of his daughter
Mary Sue
(etc.)

If your father has remarried:

Mr. and Mrs. James T. Smith
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of his daughter
Mary Sue
(etc.)

If the wedding is given by your divorced parents, and each has remarried,

Mr. and Mrs. James T. Smith
and
Mr. and Mrs. Scott .M. Jones
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Mary Sue Smith
(etc.)

How to Write Wedding Invites

When decidinghow to write your wedding invites, and what style of wording to use, remember that... the honor of your presence... usually refers to a religious or formal service and.... the pleasure of your company... usually refers to a civil or casual service. Consultants at specialty shops are available to help you with the wording.

The only difference in wording between military and civilian weddings is in the use of service titles. These titles are used in the following manner:

- army, marine corps: rank of captain or higher
- navy: rank of commodore or higher

Their rank precedes their name, and the service designation follows on the next line under their name:

Captain Robert John Brown
United States Army

For officers whose ranks are below those listed above, list their name on a single line, with the line below showing their rank and service designation:

Robert John Brown
Lieutenant, United States Navy

For military personnel without rank, list their name on a single line, with the line below showing their service designation:

Robert John Brown
United States Marine Corps

A bride in the military may omit using her own rank and service designation on the invitations unless she plans to be married in her uniform.

The addressing should be handwritten. Traditionally it is done in black ink, but the same color as the printing may also be used.

The invitations will come with two sets of envelopes.

When addressing outer envelopes:
- All formal titles such as doctor, captain, and reverend are written out.
- Semi-formal titles such as Ms., Mr., and Mrs. are abbreviated.
- Avenue, street, road, etc., are written out, as are the city and state.

The wording on the inner envelope should include the titles and the last names only of the invited adults. If you wish to invite children under the age of eighteen, write their first names on a line below their parents on the inner envelope. Older children in the family should receive their own invitations. The phrase... and family... instead of the childrens name should never be used.

Mr. and Mrs. Johnson
John, Scott, Sarah, and Sue

Once the invitations are addressed, place all the enclosures in the envelopes in this manner:

- Place the reception card inside the invitation.
- Put the response card in its envelope, and place inside invitation
- Place map, if used, inside invitation
- Place tissue over printing on invitation to prevent smudging
- Tuck the invitation, folded edge down, into the inner envelope.
- Place the inner envelope into the outer envelope so the writing on the inner envelope faces flap.

When purchasing stamps for mailing, have the invitation, including all enclosures, weighted to determine the correct postage.

Mail all the invitations at the same time, using first-class stamps.

A stamp must be provided on the return envelope if response cards are used.

The following example of response card wording eliminates confusion for your guests and increases the likelihood that they will return the cards on time.

The favor of a reply
is requested before
June first.

M_____________________________
will _________ will not _______ attend.
Number of persons: _______________

When ordering invitations, also order any other stationery accessories you may need. This includes:

- Reception cards, showing the time and place of the event.
- Response cards with printed reply-address envelopes, to be enclosed with the invitation so you can plan for the number of guests that will attend the reception.
- Informal thank-you notes, having the name of the bride or the bride and groom on the outside, and blank on the inside.
- Thank-you notes, with a preprinted message to acknowledge when a gift is received.
- Personalized napkins and matches for the guests to use or to keep as souvenirs.
- Announcements, to be sent to those you would have liked to attend your wedding, but who could not.
- Pew cards, rarely used, but appropriate for ultra-formal wedding situations, e.g., with celebrities and dignitaries: the cards may be enclosed with the invitation or sent after the acceptance has been received to ensure tha correct number of seats.
- Wedding programs, showing the order of the service and listing all participants. These can be folded or rolled like a scroll and tied with ribbon. Not only does a printed program serve as a guide to your wedding ceremony, but it is also a keepsake for your guests.

Programs can be engraved, printed with offset printing, or produced by word processor on a laser printer, with calligraphy added later.

The program covers may be obtained from printers who offer a variety of paper stocks, from manufacturers of wedding invitations who offer several different styles, or from religious supply houses of bookstores who carry appropriate church bulletin covers. Or they can be of your own creation, including a photograph of the bridal couple, special drawing, etc.

The program could contain the wedding date, time, and location; the names of all the participants, their positions in the wedding, and their relationship to the bride and groom;; and the order of the ceremony, with any special reading or observances. Expressions of the gratitude from the bridal couple to their families and guests, and any clarifying information regarding the wedding service or reception, could also be included.

If possible, have your programs printed only two weeks or so before the wedding, to include any last- minute changes. Allow enough time, however, for proofreading the copy, making any corrections, and receiving delivery of the finished product.

Thank-you notes do not have to be long, but they should be personal. to achieve this goal:

- Mention your spouses name.
- Mention the gift.
- Tell what you liked about the gift.
- Tell how you will use it.

- It is better to use the blank thank-you note (informals) rather than the preprinted ones.

- Thank-you notes that denote the couple as being married - Mr. and Mrs. Robert Brown or Mary Sue and Robert Brown - should be reserved for use after the wedding. For notes sent before the wedding, the printing should read as in these example: Mary Sue Smith and Robert Brown, or Mary Sue and Robert, or Mary Sue Smith.

If the engagement is broken after the wedding invitations are in the mail and there is sufficient time, you may send a printed announcement of the change of plans, as in this example:

Mr. and Mrs. _____________
announce that the marriage of their daughter,
__________ to Mr. ______________,
will not take place.

When there is not enough time, you will need to phone each invited guest. It is not necessary to reveal reasons for the breakup. Any gifts must be returned to the sender.