When is it okay to call your ex?

Before talking about this magical time period, we first need to explore what you should NOT be doing immediately after your ex breaks up with you. Sitting around feeling sorry for yourself is a pretty common one, but not very constructive. Another popular activity would be stalking your ex, hounding them, begging for your relationship back, and trying to get them to change their mind about ending things. Driving past your ex’s job or home is another really bad idea, which could even lead to your ex being afraid of you.

And you know what? All of these activities are going to delay getting back together with your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend, as you push them further and further away from any sort of reunion.  Getting back with your ex becomes next to impossible if you’re not willing to learn self control.

What You Should Do As Your Ex is Breaking Up With You

If you’re lucky enough to read this before your ex breaks up with you, then you probably have a sense that things in your relationship are “off”. If not, you can use this advice on your next relationship, provided you and your ex don’t get back together and run off into the sunset.

When your boyfriend or girlfriend sits you down and begins giving you the breakup speech, what you do during that time period is extremely important. Most people try to fight the break up, and offer what they believe to be convincing arguments that the romance should continue. What these people don’t realize however, is that their boyfriend or girlfriend has already made up their mind… and therefore, it’s too late for that type of approach.

Instead, you need to agree with the break up. This might be the single most important thing you can do if you really want to get your ex back. By not fighting your boyfriend or girlfriend’s decision, you’re actually placing yourself on their side – so to speak. Tell them something like:

“You’re right. Things haven’t been working out, and we both pretty much know it. Maybe going our separate ways is the best thing for us. I wish you luck.”

Imagine your ex’s face as you utter these words. He or she is going to be absolutely stunned that you’re not only okay with breaking up, but that you’re actually suggesting it yourself! Instead of asking how long should I want before calling my ex, you should be working on ways to preemptively blow your ex’s mind, creating an atmosphere where your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend will actually wonder whether or not they even should be breaking up with you… as in the case above. Agreeing to take time apart is going to keep your ex’s respect, seize back power, and actually make you a hell of a lot more attractive than if you just walked away sulking and upset about losing that person.

What You Should Do After Your Ex Breaks Up With You

Now if you’re reading this after the breakup already happened, don’t worry… there are still ways you can get your ex’s attention (and respect, if needed) back. In working to reverse the break up, there are a number of things you can do to make your ex want you back. The best ones are listed here.

“So how long should I wait before calling my ex?”

If you’ve let your ex know that you’ve accepted the end of your relationship… AND you’ve completely broken off contact with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend (meaning no calls, emails, text-messages, and the like…), then the general rule of thumb is to wait 4 weeks before calling them again.

A month’s time is just long enough to give your ex a chance to miss and need you again, but not long enough that they’re starting to move on to a life without you. Not only that, but because you’ve left your ex alone for that time period? He or she will actually welcome a call from you. Calling your ex at that point will be greeted without them wondering if you have ulterior motives, as they’ll already be curious about what you’ve been up to. But this only works if you’ve broken contact completely… you can’t cheat on that one.