Are you going through a roller coaster of emotions because you had a boyfriend break up with you?  This has got to be a rough time in your life. You're certainly hurting and you want to know what's the reason for your boyfriend break up.

You might think you could benefit by using this time to evaluate yourself and your life.  But such introspection is overrated and it probably won't get you too far.  That's because the reason behind your boyfriend break up probably has little to do with you. He has his own issues.  The reason is him, not you.

Maybe you want to burn some time and energy to get your ex back.  If that's your choice, remember these important pointers:

• Don’t chase after or pester your ex.When you're getting through a boyfriend break up, your access to him is minimal.  Don't text message many times throughout the day.

• If you choose to flirt with other guys when he's around, that's okay.  It may push him to wanting you back.

• If you do go out on a "friendship" date, be upbeat but don’t crank up the pressure and try to get more out of him than he's willing to handle.

But if in your heart you know your relationship is over when your boyfriend break up happens, it's best for you to look past him and move on.

One important action you can take shortly after your boyfriend break up is to compose a long letter to him in which you let your thoughts and emotions flow freely.

Talk about the good and bad time you shared.  Tell him off and call him names if it will make you feel better.  However, once you're finished writing, don’t mail the letter!  Instead, light a match and set it on fire.  Watch the ashes curl up and blow away.

This symbolic immolation of your relationship is a very effective and satisfying way to reach closure after a boyfriend break up.

Next, exchange property.  Return his floppy hat you liked to wear at the beach.  Get back the mystery novel he borrowed from you.  And just throw away any unimportant small stuff.  Empty your surroundings of every reminder of him.

Pack up any gifts you received from him and store them away for the time being.  And be sure to deal with any financial issues such as money owed to each other or closing joint bank accounts.

When you've completed a property exchange, don't have any communication with your ex for at least a month.  This is important because after a boyfriend break up, you must give yourself a good piece of space and time.

A boyfriend break up is painful, but it doesn't mean your life is over.  Actually, it can be a good thing because it frees you to find a true soul mate -- and to have fun looking.

But don't assume just because you’ve endured a boyfriend break up that your relationship is entirely over.  You may feel there's a possibility to attract him back to your side.  If so and if it’s something you truly want, go for it.

If it's meant to be, your love can withstand a boyfriend break up.

Learn all you need to know about how you can deal with a boyfriend break up

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