I want to tell you how you can use relationship psychology not only in coping with a break up but also in getting your ex back. The same principles also apply to an existing relationship which needs strengthening.

Basically we have to learn to recognize what destructive or damaging behaviors can ruin a relationship and how good old fashioned compromises can be a valuable asset. That is how politics works but the same is true for relationships, perhaps even more so. Men and women also communicate their wants and needs in quite different ways.

Actions speak louder than words and that is especially true for men. If a woman nags her partner all the time about certain issues, problems or negative behaviors, then she may as well bang her head against the wall. Those negative behaviors will more than likely double.

A women should learn to take a more psychological approach and the simplest way of all is to let certain things pass and avoid an argument. If the women is constantly miserable, upset or angry, then the man is likely to be driven away and will become more distant. This is not to say that certain issues should be brushed under the carpet but there is a always a happy medium. This is one reason why some couples break up and they have no idea about coping with a break up because they are unaware of certain relationship psychology principles.

Men will respond to a positive happy woman and will do everything in their power to keep her that way. A lot of relationships depend on being happy in one another's company. if the woman keeps on analysing, discussing and arguing, then there is little hope that the couple will be successful in coping with a break up and even less successful in getting back together again.

If you are a woman you may find it hard to be always smiling and happy but there are ways of making it easier. Remember to do something that makes you feel great, new hairdo, gym, buying something or cooking. If these things make you happy then you can transmit that to your partner. Most relationships are based on shared happy experiences. These are the things that are so important in bonding.

This does NOT mean that when a woman has a problem, she should hide it. This is when talking is necessary and important because why should a woman always have to present a happy face? If you are a man, you have to learn to listen and ask questions and show that you are actively listening. If you feel that your partner is distancing herself from you, try listening sympathetically and make a contribution to the discussion. This shows a woman that you value her highly enough to actually sit down and listen. You cannot always blame PMT !

How do you develop your listening skills? Switch off any media like cell phones, TV and the laptop. I said men prefer actions and here is a good practical example. Listening strengthens bonding and makes a woman feel more loved and wanted and that in turn will put her in a better mood so it pays off handsomely in the long run. This can strengthen a relationship and it can also help couples in coping with a break up if they really want to get back together again.