Has your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife recently broken up with you?  This is a very hard time for anyone to go through.  So, what should be yourfirst move after a breakupthat will help you end up back together?

Believe it or not, the first move is to avoid contact with your ex. This may seem counterproductive, but it is a vital step in the overall process of getting back together with your ex. If you constantly call, text or contact her, she will think you are desperate. She will also hold all of the power. You don't want her to think either one of these things, do you? You can avoid it by ignoring her calls and resisting the urge to call her.

Think of the time immediately following a break up as a time to take for yourself. Get some of the power in the relationship back. When you do not call your ex, she will start to wonder why. When she calls you and you don't jump to the phone, she will have time to miss you and think about you. It will start to drive her crazy wondering what, or who, is keeping you so busy. Surely, she had expected that you would be completely heartbroken and begging her to come back. Your lack of attempts to reconcile will surprise her. This is what you want to happen! If she starts to call you or text you over and over, your plan is working! Soon, you will be able to move on to the next part of the program. This is the part when you allow a bit of contact.

During this time apart, keep yourself busy. Even if it is just spending time with family and friends. Maybe you could begin a new exercise program. Do all of the things that you didn't have time to do when you were a couple. Make sure everything you do is a positive addition to your life. Do keep in mind that if your ultimate goal is to get back together with your ex, it is not a good idea to start dating every girl or guy that you encounter!

Although the first move after a break up is easy to accomplish, it is probably the hardest step emotionally. Be strong and it may pay off.