5 key beliefs create the difference between success and failure, wonderful relationships and a lonely life, abundance and poverty, happiness and depression. Are your core beliefs primarily positive or negative? This article will help you pinpoint those beliefs and help you to change them.
I'm not good enough– I'm a loser, I'll never amount to anything
If this is a belief you have about yourself, you won't see any point in trying to reach a goal, even for something you really want, because you've already identified yourself as "not good enough" to achieve it.
I'm not lovable– I'm fat/ugly, I'm not interesting enough
This belief blocks friendships and relationships because you're always looking for a slight or for evidence that people don't want to be with you.
I don't belong– I don't fit in anywhere, I'm always the outsider, I'm different
If you believe this, you'll hold yourself apart from people, won't try to get involved or interact and will be constantly looking for rejection.
I'm stupid- I'm useless, I don't understand
This is a belief that stops you trying anything new because you're already convinced you can't do it.
I'm a victim– I'm powerless, I'm helpless, I'm unlucky
The "victim" believes that they have no control over their lives or their circumstances, that they have to accept whatever life throws at them.
To empower yourself, follow these steps:
Choose one belief to work on
If you identify any of these beliefs as yours, pick one to work on as a start. Examine the belief in more depth: do you believe it all the time or is it only triggered by specific situations? Do you remember when you first felt it? Are you the same person now as you were then?
Find a more positive, balanced belief that is still realistic for you
You can't jump from "I'm stupid" to "I'm brilliant" but you can move from "I'm stupid" to "there are many things I do well and some I do not so well." Keep it believable and positive.
Look critically at your old belief
What actual evidence do you have of it? Is itreallytrueallthe time? Could the "evidence" you see have another meaning? Maybe you were wrong on one occasion but does that really make you totally stupid?
Get evidence supporting your new belief
Looking into your past and present, what evidence can you find that your new belief is true? What are the things you do well? Make a list of them and when you feel the old belief weighing you down, look at your list – these are all things that you do well!
Reflect
Now, step back and examine that old negative belief again. Which describes you better - your new belief or the old one?
