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They say that breaking up is hard to do and the relationship experts will back this up. Breaking up can feel like someone close to you has died. The grief can be unbearable and the loss can feel overwhelming.



There are real ways to get an ex back. When approaching your ex about getting back together again:



1. Be Honest



Open honesty is called upon to mend the mistakes of the past. When the breakup occurred, there were problems between the two of you. It's important to be honest and take responsibility for your actions.



Let your ex know that you are willing to make changes so the relationship between the two of you can grow.



2. Be Strong



Don't appear to be weak. Signs of weakness will not gain respect from your ex toward you or help win your ex back. It's Ok, to let your ex know how much you miss him or her. It's not Ok, to appear weepy and emotionally distraught over the breakup.



3. Take Inventory



Do a personal inventory and pin point what went wrong in the relationship the first time around. This is one of the most important ways to get an ex back. You really need to have a good idea of what role you played in the relationship coming apart. It's also important to understand what responsibilities your ex had in the break up.



When you know what led up to the breakup, then you have some knowledge about what issues need to be worked out, so the relationship does not repeat itself in a breakup again.



4. Arrange a Meeting



Set up a meeting with your ex at someplace that is open, yet where the two of you can talk about things.



If you want to get your ex back, you will have to take the first step in arranging a contact. Let this first contact be easy going and as free of drama and blame as possible. The general idea is to let down his or her guard and be open to the idea of getting back together again.



5. Be Clear about Your Intention



Let your ex know how you feel about getting back together. Don't be needy or manipulative in your discussion about getting back together. Be straight forward and honest.



6. Be Interested



Listen to your ex and ask leading questions to get him or her to open up and talk to you. Open communication is going to be the key to getting your ex back. Be interested in what they are saying to you. If you don't agree, don't fly off the handle and get mad. It's Ok, to disagree, it's not Ok to start a heated argument because you don't see eye, to eye. Ultimately, it is not worth it to allow an argument to hinder your get back together plan.



7. Be Open to Change



All of the ways to get an ex back, will require changes in the relationship. Something broke down the first time. If you took an inventory, then you must have recognized certain troubling issues that kept resurfacing in the relationship that played into the breakup. These troublesome issues are the ones that need to be dealt with. Ignoring the problems will not make them go away. This will only cause them to keep popping up.



In the final analysis, ways to get an ex back is not one single thing to do, but a combination of actions that need to be taken to clear the way to try again. It takes time and commitment from both parties. You can't do all the hard work by yourself. It is rarely one person's fault that a breakup will happen. It always takes two people to tango and make or break a relationship.




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