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There are many conflicts that arise in high conflict child custody cases. Many of them involve a struggle over what information does and does not need to be shared between the parents. While joint physical custody guarantees certain rights and joint legal custody guarantees other's, there are many gray areas. One of those gray areas is the right of the other parent to know where you live.

It is very common for high conflict parents to have a restraining order or no contact order. It is also common for them to want to protect themselves from the ex by maintaining their privacy. Even those who don’t have a protective order but want to protect their privacy may be reluctant to give up a change of address. This can lead to a high stress level and numerous arguments about whether or not the law requires parents to share their addresses.

The fact is that unless the address is mentioned in the custody and visitation order, it is not required for a parent to share it. If one parent has a reasonable need to know the address (and most judges will agree) then that parent can file a motion to have that information shared. This of course presents a classic chicken and egg scenario for the high conflict child custody parent when attempting to serve the motion on the parent. If you don’t have an address, how can you serve them.

The parent that refuses to share the address should be careful because that decision could be interpreted as not being in the child's best interest when it comes to meeting with the mediator or evaluator. That decision may be a choice of evils. If you choose to be uncooperative, you may risk your visitation schedule. If you choose to be cooperative you could end up enabling behavior you don’t want.

If this is truly a matter of safety for you then file for a restraining order and use that to your advantage. If you have a restraining order that allows you to keep your address private then it cannot be used against you during the custody battle.


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