I can understand your reaction. It is one of shock, disbelief and intrigue. It is a very idiotic, hard-to-digest, impracticable and self-destructive suggestion, you say.  It hits at the very foundation of relationship of love or marriage. Both these are based upon mutual trust in fidelity of the partners.

But let us be honest. We tend to get bored of each other after a period of time. Try howsoever hard you may to reinvent yourself and make yourself attractive to your partner, they know what is the inside reality. They have seen it all. They know what actually lies beneath the makeovers—facials, dresses of latest fashions, lingerie, perfumes, Kama sutra  postures, oohs, aahs and all those tricks to keep the heat on.

Our eyes and thoughts keep wandering. They do even when you are actually doing it. Your partner only becomes a proxy-- an excuse to release your tensions in absence of alternatives. We pretend to love to keep the relationship going on.

We carry on with our assumed honesty until a time comes when we  get tired and decide to go for greener pastures. We then invent excuses to justify our actions to break up the relationship.

This is, of course, not to deny that conflicts of views, habits and lifestyles do factor in the break ups. But most of these can be resolved by one way or the other. But it is difficult to overcome the urge for change and novelty.

Would it finish off our love for each other?

Perhaps not. Love and sex are two distinct feelings. Love is a wider term. Sex is like hunger for food. We cannot eat the same food all the time. We want change. But this hankering for change ends after some time, when we have had and seen it all. It is like yearning for porn, which becomes disgusting after sometime.

Love includes sex, but it is essentially a predominant feeling of spiritual/mental bond, a sense of inseparableness, incompleteness without the other.  We become so much dependent upon each other that it becomes unthinkable to live alone. We become so attached to each other that we feel insecure without each other.

This kind of feeling becomes quite visible when one of us falls ill or faces some other difficult problem. How much affection and care we shower upon our partner, our outside relationships not withstanding!

This kind of feeling becomes more evident when we have had enough of sex within our relationships or outside them. Until then, we have to redefine our idea of fidelity and permissible space for our partners. Why try to control and be possessive of the spirit of another human being? Why try to curb the freedom of another individual? Why hate our loved ones because they occasionally want a different fare from the one you offer?

Let us not forget that everybody feels homesick even after visiting the most attractive destinations.

Cannot swallow this bitter pill? O.K. There are other alternatives also.

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