It was early morning and it was raining cats and dogs. It seemed that everything is going to fall today only and nothing will remain tomorrow to happen. Standing on window I was thinking of fast moving world. After spending some time staring at moving vehicles I got disturbed by feeling of backward movement of road and returned to my bed.

I could now feel that latent part of my heart, mind and soul is becoming more important by manifesting itself more explicitly. It’s amazing, the way I say sometime that the bygones are bygones and I don’t bother about them, when they keep haunting me all the times. No one is going to get rid of his past for sure, not me at least.

I can compare that road and vehicles with my life and I limited just to body. Life is just like that road in abstract form on which we are trying to speed up ourselves continuously and life starts backward movement and them comes the state of mind when it stops working being utterly confused.

Everything is same just like yesterday; me, the nature, the rain, and road. All were there yesterday. But then what is the problem with me, my mind, my thinking? Why I have started thinking so much? Why the virtue is becoming vice for me? “Thinking is the capability which has put human being on the top of all creation”.

As much I remember, at the beginning of my life, when I started feeling my existence, there were simplicity in my thinking and a domain, range, a boundary beyond which I had no access. Time has changed every particle in me and now I am totally different person who always try to transcend limits. All the ventilation of my mind is now open to all types of exposure. But then comes the confusion as to what, among them, is for me to deal with. I think that these are the vicissitudes of life and everybody has to face it one day.

I was trying to recall my past for the sake of experience and learning. Past is the gem which if polished can give different facets of life? It is said that one realization in life is enough for a person to carry himself to a height of recognition. But what if one’s life is full of realization like mine? I have experienced this in my life when I realized my mistake and then made a resolution and then forgot everything leading same type of life committing same types of mistakes over and again, not bothering about the consequences. I don’t think that this is unique with me. Sticking to resolution taken at the time of stress and strain is not realistic affair, especially when those stresses are gone. This is just like calling god at the time of adversity. Then, what is the meaning of realization and resolutions on our life? I feel that it’s only the passing phase of life. But then the experiences accumulate in the person’s psyche slowly and gradually to make him better, focused and oriented.

I commenced new life with every realization and experience and today I am totally different person. This process was so gradual that I can hardly accept the change. It is only when I compare “I” of past and present.

The rain has stopped and world is moving even faster but very smoothly…