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During a break up, there’s often a point where you and your ex make contact again. If you’ve been trying to get your boyfriend back, or he’s been working on winning you over, there’s a good chance the two of you will reconnect verbally, or maybe even face to face.
But what happens when you see each other… and fall right back into bed again? What if it’s “just for sex?” Is it okay to sleep with your ex boyfriend if you want him back? If everything you’ve been trying to get his attention hasn’t been working, can sex be used as a weapon? Or will this kind of behavior actually damage your chances of re-establishing a relationship with him again, hurting the future you might have together?
To Sleep With Ex Boyfriend or Not To Sleep With Him – That is the Question!
Breaking up is lonely business. Even people who know they’re not right for each other might agree that they still rock in bed. Sex is one of the most dynamic and passionate aspects of any relationship – loving or not. But should it be used to get your ex back? Can you use sex as a crowbar to pry your way back into your boyfriend’s life… and the even bigger question: should you?
That question, answered in full: Getting an Ex Boyfriend Back
Friends With Benefits – The Big Myth
One of the more established ideas is that after breaking up, you and your ex can evolve into something called “Friends with benefits”. The word ‘devolve’ might be a more accurate term here, because you’ve ended every aspect of the relationship except for the sexual part. Sleeping with your exboyfriend after the two of you have gone your separate ways can be fun, exciting, and have a nasty forbidden aspect that most people find very appealing. But that being said, it can also be dangerous for your emotional state.
If you want your ex back and he starts pushing to sleep with you, chances are good it’s only for sex. As tempting as it might be to have sex with your ex, you need to first examine the consequences. If this is likely to hurt your feelings, cooler heads should prevail. In the effort to get physically close to your boyfriend again, you might latch onto his “friends with benefits” idea and roll with it… right into the sack. You might also wake up the next day expecting that it meant something to him, when in reality, that one night might be all he was interested in.
Sleep With Ex Boyfriend Rules and Regulations
If you’ve been trying to get back together with an ex boyfriend, you’re going to want very badly to sleep with him. You’ll reason and rationalize that it will bring you both closer together, and in some ways it actually will. You’ll think that since you’ve done it so many times before, one more time couldn’t really hurt. And you’ll also start convincing yourself that if you can rock his world… that you can make your ex realize just what he’s missing.
All of the above things may be true, and there are actually times when it’s okay to sleep with your ex. Those times however, should come during the process of reconciliation – and not hit you when you’re least expecting it. If he calls you up out of the clear blue sky and suggests hanging out with you, there’s no reason why not to meet with your ex boyfriend. But having sex that very same day or night might not be such a good idea. Going too fast can damage the chance that your future relationship will mean something, and could give your ex the impression that you’re totally fine with some hit-and-run tactics. When your ex boyfriend’s phone doesn’t pick up the next day, you might find yourself feeling used and humiliated instead of the exhilaration you felt the night before.
A general rule? When getting back with an ex you should probably wait until the third date before starting anything physical again (the second date at the most). Whether or not you sleep with your ex boyfriend should upon how long you’ve been apart, the level of interest, and how closely you reconnect during your reunion date.
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Calls You
Handling it correctly when your ex calls you is an important part of getting back together. You can’t seem too eager, nor too distant. Your attitude needs to give him the go-ahead that you’re still interested in him, but at the same time you need to demonstrate to him that you’ve already started moving ahead with your own life. Some of the best advice when it comes to contacting and communicating with your ex can be found here.
So Should I Sleep With My Ex Boyfriend or Not?
In all honesty, it’s up to you. Balancing your own libido against what you perceive to be your ex boyfriend’s true intentions can be pretty tough. Before you do anything, make sure you ask yourself one simple question: If I wake up and he doesn’t return my calls, will I be okay with that? If not, then you probably should take things slower and get a more definite idea for how your ex feels about you. He may already want you back – and that’s a good thing – but in an attempt to show you his intentions on a physical basis he may be rushing things himself.
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