Autism Acceptance
One of the greatest gifts, we as parents, can give our children on the Spectrum, is our acceptance of Autism as being part of their intrinsic selves.
When we can reach a heart-felt understanding that our children are unique individuals with their own temperament, personality, psychological/cognitive, physical/biological and emotional ‘make-up', whose immediate social, familial, physical etc., environment has a direct influence on their individuality and experience of life, we can in various moments, whilst excluding the input of others (outside influences), be re-centred in our own mini universe of the family unit and in our totally unique relationship to and with each other.
To refine my meaning here, imagine your immediate family unit as the ‘inner circle' of your existence on this planet. Within this primary circle, we work to understand each other; recognise and appreciate first-hand what makes each other ‘tick', how our unique relationship with each other is ‘personal' to you, and from that circle we can reach out to others/things to expand on our life experience or we can invite into that circle persons/experiences/things which will directly affect, complement and/or inadvertently harm our unique ‘inner circle' unit.
As parents, the choices we make; the things/people we invite into this ‘inner-circle'; the people/things we reach out of the ‘inner-circle' to or for, for the hopeful benefit of our children and ourselves, will have a direct impact on our ‘inner-circle's' wellbeing.
If we build a strong partnership of souls in the membership of our unique ‘inner-circle'; aim to secure a solid acceptance of each of the members unique individuality (including abilities and intrinsic ways of being – including the presence of Autism) and the truth and reality of their beingness, we can offer this unique cluster of souls a healthy, humane, positive and substantial ‘base' of ‘wellness' and stability, from which we can aim to make appropriate choices for the assistance, strengthening and overall wellbeing of the ‘unit'.
As parents, we can reach a personal understanding of acceptance of Autism (and the intrinsic being of each family member) via educating ourselves in ‘things' we may not understand; connecting with the souls of our children, and being the ‘gate-keeper' of wanted (or necessary) and unwanted (or unnecessary) influences on our selves and children.
When our autistic children grow to feel and know that we accept their intrinsic selves, they too can gain confidence and acceptance in their own ways of being. As Susan Boyle (UK singer) similarly described her desire for others to ‘view' her as a person recently, a young autistic man once said to me, "I was born as me….I want to be free to be that me…not what others think I should be…"
With Autism acceptance in its truest form, we are able to make choices for our autistic children/teens/adults which truly are in their best interests. Not follow or accept a fad treatment, a ‘snake-oil salesman' remedy for Autism (‘cure'), or be swept along in a whirlwind of tumbling voices telling you your child "must have..", "must be..", "won't be ‘normal' unless..", is unacceptable being autistic and so on…..
Autism is a life-long differing ability. We can and must promote Autism acceptance within our communities where the need arises. But the most important ‘place' for Autism acceptance to begin and soulfully emanate from is within the family unit – the ‘inner circle' – the centre of our own existence. From such ‘unity', those many experiences and people who occupy the ‘circles' exterior to our own will hopefully learn the true meaning of Autism acceptance in it's most natural and powerful form. And because of our acceptance and true understanding of our Autistic children (who can be very vulnerable), we can offer a ‘safe', understanding, empathetic and ‘protective' environment from which they may venture into the ‘circles' beyond our own as they grow.
Louise Page M.A.I.P.C., Q.M.A.C.A. (Australia)
