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The answer to this question is actually a conflict between the opinions of marriage experts and experience. Ask any marriage counselor, "Please how may I choose my spouse to have a lasting marriage?" And the instant answer you will get is that you have to know your partner very well before you will be able to know whether to marry him/her. In implication what they mean by this is that marriage can only survive where there is prior courtship-a long relationship to find out facts about your partner. But come to think of it, can we say out of experience that this is true and nothing but the truth? I don't know about you-where you live. I can only speak based on the experience of where I come from. I am an African, and African experience has shown that it is not true in all circumstances. Man is man, not a machine or any other kind of programmed apparatus that must act in a programmed or a predictable manner. No amount of courtship can guarantee a painless marriage, no matter how thorough it may be. Experience has shown many people who had courted for years before marriage, but had gone the divorce way after some years after that. Isn't that enough to show that courtship does not guarantee lovely marriage? There is no amount of vigilance one may keep to find out faults that can show on everything one needs to know before marriage. Marriage environment is different from courtship environment. The experiences that show up in marriage environment cannot be in courtship environment. Whereas some people live separately during courtship, they live together during marriage. And in most cases, the partners do not bear the burdens of each other during courtships much, but in marriage, the opposite is the case. The slight changes can bring about reverse in what some people may think that their partners are before marriage. And that is the reason why marriages fail in spite of courtships.
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