We live in a time of extraordinary opportunities, which bring with it extraordinary expectations. But at the same time, it brings with it significant challenges, stresses and worries. Challenges are “good” stress that make one to be more effective and productive. But the flip side is, challenges may also lead to failures, disappointments, worries and “bad” stress. We all have moments of triumphs as well as failures. Satisfaction and stress remain a part of our life. Whereas satisfaction and sense of achievements charge us with energy to do even better, stress drains our energy and if not managed properly, puts us in a downward spiral.
To understand the exact nature of “bad” stress and how to handle it, consider this little story:
A lecturer was giving a lecture to his students on stress management. He held a glass of water, stretched his arm to full and asked the audience, “How heavy do you think this glass of water is?”
“About 400 grams” was the reply.
“Can you hold it for 1 minute” The lecturer asked.
“Yes” was the response from audience
“For 5 hours” he asked again.
“May be” came the general answer.
“And can you hold it for 2 days, arm stretched, no breaks in between?” He asked.
The audience nodded their heads in NO.
The lecturer explained, “Most of worries or stresses in our life are “small negatives” which weigh very little, as this water glass. However, what really causes discomfort is the length of time for which we remain clung to these, just like glass of water. If we hold glass of water in a stretched arm for a minute, it is OK. If we hold it for an hour, we will have an ache in the arm. And if we hold it for 2 days (if we can), then we’ll need an ambulance. It is the exact same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier is becomes.”
“Same is the case with our burdens. If we carry these all the time, these will become heavier and heavier. And if we do not put these burdens or glass of water down, we’ll collapse”.
“So far effective stress management, put the glass down, rest for a while before holding it up again.”
There are a number of ways to implement this principle in your life. A few ways I follow this principle include:
a. When leaving office, I scribble my worries, stresses, tensions on a piece of paper. Then I tell my mind that
“Information is on the “clip board”, ready to be pasted when required. However, I am now going to run another programme “personal and family time”. I’ll see the contents of clip board tomorrow”
Strange it may be, but when the next day I paste the clipboard contents, many seem irrelevant and are discarded straight away.
b. Engage in an activity that demands focus, is challenging and absorbing e.g. reading, writing my journal
c. I “live in the moment”. That is, I focus my sensors on the present moment, so that if I am walking, I concentrate on my stride, the surroundings, the nature etc.
d. I maintain a list of small, meaningful tasks that need to be done. So whenever I feel that I am holding the glass unnecessarily, I engage in these “to do” activities, which may include replacing a light bulb, washing my car, writing a letter, or returning a phone call.
Try to learn to make your burdens, your worries to rest. Think of them like bottled water in your backpack instead of a glass of water held in a stretched arm. Bring out your bottled water only when required. Let it be helpful for you, instead of becoming your ruthless master.
