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When you first found out that your boyfriend had cheated , you went through many different emotions. The first was of indignation and rage, then came the feeling of humiliation and shame - what would people think if they heard about it. Why did he do this? When you asked that question, your next feeling was one of guilt. Where did you let him down? And now comes the feeling of fear. Have you lost your boyfriend to another woman? You still love him in spite of the cheating so how do you get your ex back?
Going through these emotions is only normal when you have been cheated upon. It makes you feel inadequate, like you are not enough for you man. You feel that you must be at fault in some way or he would never have strayed. You would be right, in some way some of the fault probably could be yours. On the other hand, your boyfriend could have just been seeking a cheap thrill. Men are not usually as monogamous as a female. His tendency is to roam. This is in his genes. I am not saying this is an excuse for a man to cheat, but it is a fact of life. But no matter what the cause of the cheating if you still love your man and want him, here are 4 very effective tips to get over the cheating .
1. Don't sulk around and act the injured party or victim. It is only natural for you to feel hurt, but do not expect your boyfriend to come crawling and beg forgiveness. The best thing you can do now is to be strong and calm. Getting your boyfriend back after he has cheated will require you to let things take a natural course.
2. By letting things take their natural course, means not to try and force your boyfriend to his knees and make him beg, it is not going to happen. What you have to guard against is flying into a rage and trying to make him feel guilty for hurting you so. By doing this you are apt to drive your boyfriend straight into the arms of the one he cheated with.
3. The biggest asset you have is that he came back to you. Now you must get to the reason for the cheating . Unless you know the reason for the cheating, you can't fix it. To get to the bottom you will have to calmly sit down with your boyfriend and ask him why it happened. You might not like what you hear, but you must make him be honest with you. Nothing can be fixed if you don't know the cause.
4. Once you have found the cause of the cheating and figured out how to fix it, comes the hard part. You must put it behind you and forgive and forget. You will have to guard against being suspicious of his every action. As hard as it will be, you need to learn to trust your boyfriend after he cheated on you. He can't be made to feel like a prisoner. Doing so will only lead him to find ways to escape.
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