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The most important part of any break up is right after it happens. The opening moves you make can mean the difference between winning back your exgirlfriend or losing her forever. Still, if your break up happened a while ago there are still things you can do. Get into a positive frame of mind, and let's talk about a few things.
First off, take a look around. Couples fight, break up, and get back together every single day. So why not you? There are lots of ways these couples manage to reconcile, but all of them have one big thing in common: a success that comes from making your ex want you back. That's something most guys miss: it doesn't matter how much you love your girlfriend, or how much you want her back. Getting your ex to come back to you is all about her thoughts and feelings. Until your girlfriend emotionally and physically misses you, she won't need to be with you again. To fix your break up, you'll need to create a scenario where your ex misses you, thinks about you, and wants to be around you again. The first part of doing that? Letting go.
You need to stop any desperate behavior you may have already committed. You can never get your girlfriend back by crying, pleading, or bedding. No amount of pity she feels for you will save your doomed relationship. Reunions that you get by twisting her arm this way are always destined to fail within a week or two, and this isn't what you're looking for. Winning back your ex requires you to stop pitying yourself and start acting like a man again: preferably the man she fell in love with. Once you can accept that your relationship has ended your ex will immediately know it. The change in you will be palpable, and the stink of desperation will fade. The earlier you do this - the better off you'll be. The quicker you can acknowledge the end of your relationship, the easier it will be to get your exgirlfriend to come back to you.
Understand that you're not trying to fix your past relationship. You're letting that one end. After working toward getting back together with your ex-girlfriend, the two of you will build a whole new relationship together, on a much stronger foundation. You've got to tear down the debris of your old one in order to let this happen.
Once you've accepted the situation, your next move is to disappear from your ex's sight. After leaving you, your ex will act as if she doesn't want any contact with you anymore. In reality though, she's watching to see how you react to the break up. Seeing you upset and forlorn affirms that you loved her, which is what she wants to see (regardless of whether or not she wants you back just now). You don't want to show her any weakness here. What you want is to make her want you again, which requires strength and perseverance. As you drop out of sight, your ex will begin to miss you. But if you're always around? This won't ever happen. Which is why dropping off her radar is one of the best things you can do after a break up, to get back inside your ex girlfriend's head.
What are you doing? Where did you suddenly disappear to? These are the things your ex will be thinking about. She'll also be wondering why you haven't called, emailed, or texted her... so DON'T. Complete silence is the key to unlocking her heart right now. Anything you can say or write will only feed her ego. But not hearing from you? She'll start worrying that maybe you didn't need her nearly as much as she thought you did. She'll also be concerned that maybe she misjudged the relationship, and wasn't in the higher position she thought she was in. Getting your ex out of her comfortable little bubble is all about scaring her into facing life without you. Not being there for her puts you in a much better position. And how did you accomplish this? By doing absolutely nothing.
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