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That is where I was at just a short time ago. And guess what? I did a whole bunch of what I am going to tell you not to do. These things just plain do not work and will do more damage than good. So listen up.

The first thing you cannot do is contact them while you are in a panic. They simply are glad to be shucked of you right now. So let them have some space while you collect yourself and start to think like the cool head you were before all this happened.

I know when you get you dumped you feel like warmed over puke. You are filled with emotions you never knew existed. Talk about hopeless and helpless and just plain feeling no good. I mean; who can be any good if your love just dumped your butt, right?

But there are some things you can do right now to help you get past this experience. You will be better for it. I promise.

First off, keep those feeling under control. Anything you do right now will most likely push your ex even further away and justify why they left in the first and second place.

Calling them names, like "stupid" and "idiot" and "fool", like I did will not help your cause. Arguing and telling them what a mistake they made will not make you nearer and dearer to their heart.

Second off. Calling as soon as you can hoping you can make them see the light and part of that light is how stupid they are for leaving will probably get yourself hung up on and they may not pick up the next time you call. Give them and yourself some cooling down time so cooler heads can prevail. Hot tempers never has won much of anything.

Face it, if they felt strong enough about leaving, you got a serious situation on your hands and you do not want to give them ammunition to justify their actions further.

Third off. When you have been dumped you want to make things good as fast as possible. You will look for any and every excuse to call. Don't. Please don't. For your own sake, don't. They do not want to hear from you right now. Period.

Fourth off. Do not make the mistake of acting like your about to slash your wrists. This playing the part of a victim will not help your cause. Do not be telling them you cannot live without them and what a big mistake they are making. Trust me, they are not listening right now and are not about to reason with you.

Fifth off. Stop saying you are sorry every time you speak to them. This is next to being a wimp and you need to be strong and confident right now. No one wants a wet noodle. They want strength. Something they can rely on.

Sixth off. Do not go looking for sympathy and being all down in the mouth. They plain and simply do not care how much agony you are in. Truth be known, that is what they want. They want you to suffer, because in their minds, they have been suffering for as long as they intend to take it and now want you to suffer like they have. Do not give them the satisfaction of thinking you are.

Here is the kicker. The above behavior will cause them to despise you even more than they already do. And if you do enough of it, it could get a restraining order against you. Don't do it.

I know you are hurting. Take a deep breath and repeat, "This too shall pass."


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