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Admitting To The Problem in Step One
Step One – We admitted we were powerless over alcohol / our addiction – that our lives had become unmanageable.
What does it mean, “to admit”? The word admit doesn't seem all that direct, or purposeful, all by itself. However, when put into the context of this first step, and into the context of our lives, it has tremendous power. To admit is to accept something for what it really is... it means we are being honest with ourselves.
When we walk through the doors of our first 12-step meeting, or rehab, we are practicing the admit in Step One. We have finally put down our denial (or at least pushed it aside far enough to see how to climb past it), and for the first time, in what has probably been a very long time, we are being completely honest with ourselves, and are now waving the white flag of surrender. And while this act of admission is very ego-deflating, once we walk into the doors of AA/NA/CR/CODA, we are now no longer alone in our problem. I remember how hard it was walking into my very first meeting. It felt like ultimate “walk of shame”. But once I got it through my head that every other person in that room was there because they were admitting to their own drinking problem, I began to see them as allies. In my act of surrender, I had found support and a place where my honesty was not met with judgement or ridicule.
When we admit, we let go. When we let go, we can begin to pursue the solution. Once we admit/accept/stop denying, we can stop burning all our energy in the effort to hide/control/feed our addiction. And you know how exhausting that is, right? I am still blown away whenever I think about how hard I worked to keep a drink nearby at all times. But once we stop using every ounce of energy we have to play the “game”, that energy can now be used to work the solution. And the solution is simple. Hey, the play book only has 12 Steps.
But you have to work them. That is what we are trying to do here. To stay focused on the solution and work it. And it starts with “We admitted”...
Keep climbing...
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