Many people talk with me about stopping smoking as they have tired to quit, sometimes many times, in the past and found it just too difficult; traumatic even. Maybe you've caught yourself feeling secretly jealous of friends or family members who have already successfully quit cigarettes and wondered how they managed to be so strong willed. No doubt you've heard people say "you'll quit when you're ready", and of course this is absolutely true. But what is it that causes someone to be ready? What needs to take place inside of you to ensure that achieving a life free from cigarettes is approached with 100% commitment?
The answer is simply having the right kind of motivation.
Now this may seem an obvious statement, but the key difference between those who stop smoking easily and those who fall at the first hurdle is the direction in which their minds are focused.
The fact is you can achieve just about anything in life, including becoming a non-smoker, provided there is enough leverage to drive your desire for change. Have you ever noticed how much easier it is overcome challenges when you are excited about the rewards of success?
Imagine that your motivation to quit cigarettes is like a set of balancing scales. On one side is your desire to carry on smoking (including the fears you associate with stopping) and on the other side are all the rewards and benefits of being a non-smoker. The focus of your mind adds weight to one side or the other and will determine which way the scales tip.
The problem that many people find when trying to stop smoking is they do not give themselves compelling enough reasons to tip the scales in favour of success. Of course on an intellectual level they know why they "should" stop, but their imagination is focused on how terrible it is to go without their fix, like running a mini disaster movie in their mind. As soon as there is a feeling of uneasiness, their automatic motivation is to feel better as quickly as possible, and this often results in lighting up.
People who successfully become non-smokers do so by knowing exactly how they want to benefit from quitting. They vividly imagine how great their lives will be without cigarettes. They immerse their senses in how wonderful it will feel to break the habit. They see themselves living a better life as a non-smoker and really associate into the positive sensations. Quite literally the motivation to be a non-smoker out-weighs the temptation to remain the same, even when in challenging situations.
So here is a powerful exercise for you to experience that focuses you on wanting to become a healthy, happy non-smoker. If you give this process your full attention you may well find that are motivated to stop smoking as soon as possible
CHOOSING YOUR FUTURE
It is best to read through these instructions once before carrying out each step. This exercise requires you to use your full imagination and it's usually helpful to close your eyes, so please ensure you are in a situation where it's safe and appropriate to do so.
1> In your mind imagine that in front of you there are two paths laid parallel to each other, stretching off into the distance, each representing alternative futures. The path on your left depicts the rest of your life should you choose NOT to quit smoking. The path on your right represents the positive ways your life improves by committing to stop smoking now.
2> Imagine taking a step forward onto the left path and arriving one month into the future (if you have the space you could even take a physical step forward). See yourself in a typical situation in a month's time knowing that you have continued to smoke in the usual way. If you are imagining looking AT yourself, like a third party observer, mentally step into your body so you see though your own eyes. Notice everything about the situation. See what you see and hear what you hear, and as you think about the fact that you are still smoking notice exactly how you feel inside. At this stage the emotional effects might be quite small but you'll probably start to feel disappointment that you have not quit. Really let yourself experience the event like it is actually happening now.
As the reality of the situation begins to grow, notice that beside you is a pile of cigarette butts, one for every time you smoked over the last four weeks. Really imagine what that looks like. How does it smell? How do you feel to realise that the harmful poisons and tar from each one of those cigarettes is there right inside you? Stay with this for a while before moving onto the next step.
3> Now imagine taking another step along the path, this time arriving six months into the future. Your body has had to endure another half year of harm and attack from tobacco smoke. Again, notice everything you can about where you are and what you are doing. Now vividly think about how yet another six months of smoking as impacted your life. How has your health changed? What has smoking prevented you from doing? How does it affect your relationships? Imagine a stack of all the money you have wasted on cigarettes, over there, beyond your reach (what could you have done with that?). Now look down at that pile of cigarettes butts and notice how much it has grown. Sense how the smell has increased and gets into your nose and throat. Spend a few moments really associating with what another six months of smoking has changed for you.
4> Now, taking another step, find yourself one year in the future. Still seeing through your own eyes and hearing what you hear, take in every detail you notice about the situation you are in. Experience it like it's happening now. How are you feeling about still smoking one year on? How is your health impacted now? Think about the effects on you relationships. What you are not able to do because of smoking? That pile of wasted money over there has doubled and so has the mountain of cigarette butts which is now covering your feet and climbing up your legs. How disgusting does that look to you? Feel the pungent smell in you nose and throat and know that your body has felt the effects of every single one of those cigarettes you have smoked. Linger on this sensation of while before moving on.
5> It's time to really turn things up. Take another step along the path to arrive five years into the future. It might feel uncomfortable but it's important that you immerse yourself in situation as fully as you can. What has five years of continuing to smoke done to your life? What are the impacts on you health now? How does it feel to be in a social minority, now that there are so few places you are allowed to smoke? What has smoking taken away from you? Feel every sensation as intensely as possible. Look at all of that money over there - hundreds, maybe even thousands in crisp notes - and imagine someone setting fire to the whole lot, just leaving you with that immense mountain of filthy cigarette butts, completely surrounding you. How does it smell now? How has your body suffered through smoking all of those cigarettes?
If you can stand it why not take a few more steps further into this future - 10, 20, 30 years - even go right to the end of the path and get a real sense of the damage smoking will do to many aspects of your life.
6> When you're done, come back in time to the present day and consider whether or not you want your real future to resemble what you have just experienced.
7> Now for the good part!! With your full imagination take a step forward onto the right path and go one month into the future from today. Use your mind to vividly represent a realistic situation of what it would be like to have been a non-smoker for a whole four weeks, seeing everything through your own eyes. What are the most immediate positive changes you notice straight away. Maybe there is a strong sense of pride or even relief that finally you've done it. Maybe you notice you're already breathing a lot better, or your skin looks healthier. Imagine people congratulating you on doing so well. Notice every good detail let the wonderful feelings spread throughout your body. At this point squeeze the thumb and forefinger of one hand together (this will begin to set a powerful unconscious association between the physical sensation in your fingers and your positive emotional state).
8> Take another step and move to the six month mark. You've been a non-smoker for half a year! What have you been able to achieve as a non-smoker that you could not do before? Notice how much healthier you look and feel. Maybe you're appreciating your heightened sense of taste and smell. Connect with you're new found vitality and be aware of how calmly and confidently you behave in situations where you used to be distracted by the need for cigarettes. How are you standing (or sitting)? Let yourself feel an amazing sense of accomplishment and healthiness. And, of course, don't forget to keep your eye on that growing pile of cash that has been generated by your decision to be a non-smoker. Take those great feelings inside of you and turn them up as much as you possibly can, then squeeze your thumb as forefinger together once more.
9> Now take step a into your one year anniversary. Really associate into how great it feels to have been free from nicotine for a whole twelve months. In what fantastic ways have your life improved by being a non-smoker for this long? Maybe you are doing something to celebrate your achievement. How are you enjoying your increased health and aliveness? Who else in your life is proud of you for doing such a good thing? That pile of money just there has doubled. What do you want to use it for? Let yourself experience anything else that comes to mind and take some time to really let the positive feelings grow within you, then press that thumb and forefinger together once more.
10> Now let your creative imagination take you another step further - five years in to the future. What have you been able to achieve in your life that could not have been achieved as a person chained to nicotine? The thought of cigarettes are probably now just a dim and distant memory. Let yourself fully experience how pleased and delighted you are about being one of the world's happy non-smokers; fit and healthy and totally in control of your thoughts and actions. What would that pile of money look like now? Allow your imagination to make this situation as desirable and compelling as possible. Maybe you can glance to your left and see that other version of you on the left hand path still struggling and suffering at the mercy of tobacco and nicotine. Let this fuel the positive feelings inside of you now and turn them up as much as you can. Now squeeze that thumb and forefinger together again.
You can go even further into the future if you want to, but when you're ready open your eyes and come back to the present moment.
If you have allowed yourself to do this exercise with your full and positive participation you should now be noticing a dramatic increase in your desire to be a non-smoker. This kind of motivation is what it takes to be ready to quit cigarettes with commitment and determination. You've now given your subconscious mind a clear goal to aim for by tipping the scales in favour of success. You have also set an "anchor" between the desire for being a non-smoker and the sensation of squeezing of your thumb and forefinger together. This means you can trigger these helpful feelings again and again to keep your focus where it needs to be at any time. Try it, it really works!!
